I’m so proud of you
This week, I've been deeply moved by so many stories of bravery from folks setting and maintaining boundaries with family and friends over the holidays.
These moments of courage reflect a deep realization: the only behavior we can truly change is our own.
For many, the holidays brought a mix of joy and tension—particularly when we felt obligated to engage with people who have mistreated us. Setting boundaries in these situations is no small feat. It can mean choosing to stop harmful interactions, even when doing so might lead to being misunderstood or labeled negatively.
The holidays are a time of varying experiences. For some, it was a season of connection and celebration, while for others, it brought feelings of loneliness, grief, or a sense of being on the outside looking in.
If, in the aftermath, you're now navigating complex emotions, whether due to:
🍃 Loss
🍃 Having just upheld new boundaries
🍃 Shifting traditions
Please know that your feelings are valid.
Taking care of yourself in these moments is just as important (and in some cases MORE important) than any holiday practice.
Setting boundaries can be an act of healing intergenerational trauma. By choosing to disrupt unhealthy patterns, you not only protect your own well-being but also pave the way for a healthier legacy.
It’s not an easy path—resistance from others and internal struggles can arise—but each boundary set is a practice in breaking cycles of harm.
In doing so, you create space and the opportunity for yourself and others to experience relationships built on mutual respect and care.
So, I want you to know that I see you.
I see the emotional toll it has taken on you to
Acknowledge and Validate your own experience
Identify the boundary you needed to set, and
Actually set and assert that boundary.
And now you may still be amidst the 4th step- Tending to the parts of you that are now allowed to show up on this side of the boundary.
I see your grief, guilt, sadness, and even relief. And I offer these reflection questions:
How do you honor and care for yourself after setting and upholding a boundary?
What strategies help you manage the emotions that come with choosing not to engage in unhealthy dynamics?
If this resonates with you, know you’re not alone. You do not have to answer these questions alone.
Setting boundaries is an act of self-respect and healing, and navigating the emotions that follow is part of the growth process.
If you'd like support in exploring these strategies, reach out.
Schedule a Free Brief Zoom consultation to explore if therapy or coaching with me is right for you.
