Follow Up on ANTs 🐜🐜🐜
Hi all,
I hope this finds you having spent some time in the sun recently.
If you are in the northeast of the US– you know this part of winter can be ROUGH and that any little sips of sunshine can go a long way in boosting our moods.
And speaking of mood boosting: following my latest post On Failure and Opportunity a number of folks expressed interest in learning more about ANT’s– automatic negative thoughts. So, I thought I would give a lil snapshot of my take on them in this letter.
Quick disclaimer that ANTs are embedded in a much larger school of psychological thought that I can’t fully encompass in a newsletter. And treating them is often most effective with the support of a therapist or coach 😉 but I hope that this snapshot paves some inroads to addressing them as they can be quite persnickety and powerful.
Automatic Negative Thoughts are just what they sound like– they are often quick, quiet, and immediate responses to something we are experiencing. They come in the form of words or messages in our minds that then impact how we feel and behave. I first learned about them when receiving training in Cognitive Behavior Therapy (CBT). Through this model, I understand that ANTs can be tied to other, more pervasive beliefs we may have internalized.
For example, in the newsletter mentioned above, I noted some of my ANTs related to “never accomplishing” certain goals. They could include things like
🐜“I’ll never do this,”
🐜“that was a stupid decision,”
🐜“I don’t have what it takes,”
🐜“I’m not good enough,”
…the list can go on and on.
The funky part, particularly for many folks who otherwise know themselves to have pretty decent self-esteem, is that it can be hard to believe or it can feel very incongruent to consider that if you are having thoughts like these, that they could be connected to deeper thoughts or beliefs that we internalized earlier in our lives.
“Like, I’m a pretty confident person, I disregard negative thoughts that sneak in and keep it moving.”
True. Yes. And…However good we may be at brushing off these thoughts, its still incredibly valuable to learn about where they came from and nip them in the bud. Believe me, they are doing more damage than we may think.
The internalization process of negative thoughts that become ANTs happen through repeatedly hearing these messages.
It may have been a caregiver speaking to us *or themselves* using those words. It could stem from a teacher who wasn’t very kind or another adult who we had a lot of contact with.
It can also stem from larger systemic structures devaluing our lives. Racism, Sexism, Classism, Fatphobia, Ablesim, etc all send us regular subtle and LOUD messages about our value (note that these structural influences have shown to produce symptoms of PTSD for many folks as well, that’s how damaging they are).
Often when working with folks on their ANTs in therapy, after identifying one, I will ask a question about the root.
Whose voice do you hear when you say that?
Who do you see?
What do you feel in your body?
I want to know this information before we start working to change the thoughts. Often, we need to spend some time healing the source otherwise changing negative thoughts can feel like a bandaid.
This also often gives us the information that we need to determine which new replacement thoughts would be most helpful– not more positive– but more helpful.
I want to know what the version of you who first heard those negative words needed to hear back then so we can incorporate that into what you need to hear now.
From there, we continue building awareness. It takes time to get better at noticing when the ANTs are happening. The more we notice them, the more we can address them by stopping them and applying the skills that you identify as working best.
And then we practice.
And practice some more.
And some more.
I regularly remind folks that this work isn’t a lightswitch.
It's an embodiment of major change.
The practice of healing ANTs can be life changing in that it helps us to reclaim the energy that was leaking out with them– the energy that would cause us to doubt ourselves and make choices based on those doubts rather than a belief in ourselves.
It’s some powerful sh*t.
Anywho. So much to say about there powerful little guys 🐜🐜🐜
I hope that paints a picture of how I weave some CBT into my work. I used to really hate this model because I thought it was too superficial, linear, and just forced people into some sort of fake toxic positivity. But the truth is, I have found that there are some suuuuper powerful and liberatory applications of this model that support people in freeing themselves from internalized negative thoughts and beliefs about themselves.
It's a beautiful thing to be a part of.
I hope you are off to the start of a good week.
As always, here are your options for jumping into this work with me 🤩
Book an Intensive with me here
Hop on a free consultation call here.
In solidarity,
Rebecca
